My last post, and some conversations this week, made me really think about the one day at a time mentality. Now that Jill is past the half way point of chemo, someone commented that we were on the downslope. At first I sort of agreed. But in reality, that is not the case. Make no mistake, the progress so far has been awesome. The support we have had has been awesome. Jill’s attitude has been awesome. But my mind snapped back to the fact that we have a long 2011, at best, ahead of us. Feb and March will be chemo. April will be recovery. Then Jill has 1-2 surgeries to remove the impacted breast and lymph nodes. Then the plan gets a little foggy, but I suspect it will be radiation for 6 weeks, some recovery and then more surgeries. Other breast, maybe other lymph nodes, and then ovaries. After all that recovery, she will have reconstruction at some point. Many people wait 6-12 months for that just as they are totally done with going through all this.
Even with that being the case, we are continuing to only focus on the moment. We have been doing a good job with that and will continue. I have been saying something to myself a lot lately – fear, pain, sadness, and grief are not savings accounts. Worrying about 6 months from now, or even 6 days from now, does nothing to lessen the blow should something happen down the road.
Greg will you PLEASE have Jill call me?
ReplyDeleteWow! "Fear, pain, sadness and grief are not savings accounts"! That is a fabulous motto!! One, I believe, we all need to acknowledge and remind ourselves of on a daily basis. That's an awesome reminder!!
ReplyDeleteWhy does Jill have to go through all of this chemo and radiation if she is going to have her breasts removed anyways? This has been a question I have had in my mind a lot lately so decided to ask it. Hopefully it won't be such a long explanation that you will feel overwhelmed to even answer. Anyway I am still praying for you all. Jill, you are such a strong woman, I admire your courage and strength. And Greg, you are an awesome husband and father. God will reward some day. I admire your strength and courage and determination to see that your wife is taken care of and comfortable during this very difficult time. You should be proud of all of you. And Pam hit the nail on the head when she said on facebook the other day that she has the most amazing, strong daughters in the world.
ReplyDeleteGreg & Jill,
ReplyDeleteYou are so right about keeping your focus on today. Worrying about down the road only depletes the energy you need for today and it accomplishes nothing anyway. Something as overwhelming as Jill's onocological schedule becomes less overwhelming when you can break it down into smaller "chunks". It will help to count down the chemo treatments, especially now that these will be so painful. Then you bite off the next chunk.
Dick's chemo affected his joints too, especially his hands and he found heat to help. He had a bean bag made of cherry pits that we heated in the microwave and he could hold. There are all sorts of items you can heat or place in the fridge if cold is needed and place on your body. Take care my friends. I'm praying for you daily and often during the day. Love you, Judy
Sharon,
ReplyDeleteExcellent question, and one we get from time to time (and one we asked at the start of this).
Her breast and lymph node tumors are the living working test lab for Jill. While her body was tested in many ways to see if the cancer had spread to other places, and the tests were negative, this is not 100% proof of her not having cancer in other places. This is because testing cannot find cancer in many places until it gets big enough. We do know that this cancer is aggressive and went from breast to lymph node, so it sure is the type that would go to other places.
So they need to see chemo completely get ride of the cancer in the two places they know specifically where to look. If it gets rid of it there, the odds are great that it will get rid of it anywhere.
If they just cut out the current tumors and removed her breasts, the risk would be higher of it coming up somewhere else. And as the docs have made clear - cancer in your breasts will not kill you. Cancer in other places will.
Does that make sense?
greg and jill:
ReplyDeletei continue to be amazed by the fact that you see this cancer as an opportunity for growth instead of wallowing in the multitudes of difficulties this disease has brought to you (which, by the way, you have every right to do.) the positive spin you put on everything is simply inspirational. even with so many opportunities to be beat down...you always come back up swinging. i am blessed to call you my friends.
Hi Jill - I'm so glad to hear that you're feeling better with this drug. I had Taxotere and Cytoxan in the beginning and I had lots of pain. I didn't like taking the pain meds but vicodin did work best for me, it didn't make me feel tired or out of it - I could function. Thanks for taking our picture when I rang the bell, it meant a lot! I would like to know when you're scheduled for your last treatment, I can take your picture. :) Feel free to call me or email me anytime, I get 4-6 weeks off and then surgery - yikes! 441-6110, tscism@travlead.com
ReplyDeleteHANG IN THERE!!!! Tami P.S. I think our husband's should meet, this is so hard for them too.